Give More, Spend Less – Starting With Taking Brain Breaks

Have you noticed a parent striving to meet everyone’s expectations, yet her attitude isn’t always pleasant? She’s depleted of her energy and teetering towards feeling defeated by the demands of life. You want to uplift her, but she is in an activated parasympathetic state. She’s tired, overstimulated, and encouraging herself with phrases like, “You go this, mama. Just keep pushing.” But she’s also a little doubtful. Not of her own abilities but of if she can meet the demands and be the loving presence she truly desires to be. She’s not alone. I’ve been there too, and I’m not a mother or a wife yet.

As humans, and especially as women, we give until the last drop. We hold everything together until we can’t hold anything else. I’ve seen beloved women in my life holding things together until they couldn’t. Two of them are my Mother and my Auntie Bob. I remember seeing them stand before their kitchen sinks completing tasks in an awkward position. They had the same mechanics. It was quite fascinating. I was an adolescent when I noticed the stance and asked, “Mom, do you have to use to restroom?” She answered yes. “Mom, go to the bathroom!” I saw my Auntie do the same thing on a different occasion in her own house. I also told her to go to the bathroom. She laughed and asked me how I knew. I told her about her sister. 😊

We know that like them, women hold more than their visits to the restroom. They hold memories, emotions, expectations of themselves and others all while trying to do something different to create a different set of life outcomes for themselves and their families. One of the more concerning parts of getting to the point of holding everything is that we are not always accessible to being held. Many times this is because we’re doing all the holding. Our breaking points can be minutes away. But our breakthroughs are there also. If you can relate, I want to encourage, one woman to another. If you’re a man reading this, it applies to you and your little boy as well.

1. Stop trying to make your little girl proud. She’s already proud of you. And so is your inner teenager.
2. Take brain breaks off your phone. Light a candle and watch it burn. Walk outside. Breathe in some fresh air. Listen to the sounds around you. Take in the colors and the smells of flowers. Relax your shoulders and simply breathe. You are worthy of your time and your attention.
3. When your children are seeking for your attention, and you feel like you’re at your limit, look into their eyes with softness and stillness. Simply be at your limit and love your child with eyes on them. Take a break with them if you can. Otherwise, take a break as soon as you can.
4. Let yourself be held. Whether it be your spouse, your children, your close friends and family, or the Spirit of the Most High, let yourself be held. It will soften your heart and strengthen your mind.
5. Practice knowing that your love is felt beyond meeting the demands of life and the people around you.

The bottom line is that you want your love to be felt. I know because when I’m doing everything I’m doing, I want my love to be felt as well. The truth is people know your love is there. They will be able to feel it more as you incorporate rest and enjoyment into your every day. When you come to your limit, stop and rest. Rest is designed for us to reset, regenerate, and renew for the morning.

Interested in giving more and spending less by doing an activity with your children? Check out my YouTube Video here.